How to maintain the unity of the spirit with your spouse.
Nowadays, several couples struggle to make peace, unity, oneness and love abound in their marriages. Most times, they find it difficult to agree on issues that may sometimes be as simple as how to keep the house tidy or who should pay the bills. Also, couples find it difficult to express an unreserved love towards themselves and many times focus their love on some certain things such as beauty, affluence and many others.
However, the common strives and increase in the rate of divorce resulting in an increase in the number of ungodly children are majorly caused by the inability of couples to create and maintain the unity of the spirit between themselves. You must maintain the unity of the spirit in your marriage to save your marriage from divorce.
Amos 3:3 “can two walks together except they agree”…..
Maintaining the unity of the spirit between couples means both marriage partners are controlled by the same spirit(the holy spirit), thereby, they produce fruits of the spirit which are the best measure of love and a reliable means of expressing love between marriage partners.
When couple’s don’t agree spiritually that is, surrendering themselves to the leadership of the holy spirit, no doubts, they may find it difficult to agree in other areas of their lives. And if they do, they might come to a point in their lives when their unity will be tested as a result of some certain events happening in their lives. When the winter season of marriage strikes, it is only the spirit of God that can help couples to stay connected to one another without allowing the wind of the cold season to crumble their marriage.
Eph 4:1-3. “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
When you maintain the unity of the spirit as a couple, you will continually lead and live a peaceful life. You will find it easier to agree with your spouse on many things and issues that are crumbling other person’s marriages will not have power over your marriage. In fact, it will be very difficult for the devil to find space in your home.
12 ways to maintain the unity of the spirit with your spouse
1) Fill your hearts with the love of God
Colossians 3:14 “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Having a heart filled with the true love of God will help you to love your spouse genuinely. Above every other virtue to maintain the unity of the spirit with your spouse, the first of them is the love of God
Romans 5:5b And hope do not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”
2) Have true love for one another
Ephesians 5:2 ” and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”
Constantly maintain and express true love to your spouse. Let her know that you genuinely love her as the Lord commanded, same goes with the wife too.
As spouses, you should be able to recognize the love language of your partner and never find it uneasy to constantly express such to him or her. Speaking your partner’s love language will make it easy for you to exhibit the unity of the spirit.
1Timothy 1:5 “The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.”
3) Keep a humble spirit by submitting one to another
Ephesians 5:21 “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ”.
Reverencing and submitting to one another in the humility of heart will enhance the unity of the spirit between spouses. Hold one another in high esteem, put your partner’s interest above yours and be careful enough to submit your will to your partners whenever need be.
Philippians 2:3 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves”.
4) Be patient with one another
1corinthians 13:4a “ Love is patient, love is kind.”
Lack of patience is one of the triggers of arguments and strives in various home. Be gentle and patient with your spouse. Listen when you ought to and make sure you speak every word out of love. Don’t make harsh decisions or speak bad words when you are angry because they can cause significant damage to your marriage. Furthermore, Patience will help you to treat your spouse with kindness despite their errors and mistakes.
5) Maintain the peace of God in your home.
Philippians 4:7 “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
The spirit of God is a spirit of peace. This is why Jesus Christ was called the prince of peace. Without a constant peaceful atmosphere in your home, the holy spirit will be unable to work through you and your partner. Strife will drive out God’s presence from your home, therefore make every effort to make your home a peaceful dwelling place of God’s spirit. You need the peace of God in your marriage to maintain the unity of the spirit with your spouse.
6) Always have time to pray and study God’s together.
Prayer is one of the pillars that holds a home firmly and without which the home is liable to fall. Praying together as couples will enable you to stay connected to one another spiritually and to keep the unity of the spirit. You can overcome every attack of the enemy against your home with little effort when you pray together. Just as the Bible says that one shall chase a thousand and two shall chase ten thousand. Deuteronomy 32:30
7) walk constantly in the truth.
Ephesians 4: 25 “Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbour, for we are members one of another.”
The spirit of God is also the spirit of truth. Anywhere there is deceit and deception, there will always be strife. The spirit of God cannot work in such an environment. Make sure you speak truthfully to one another always. Also, always Confide in your spouse no matter how difficult the situation is, don’t ever bury the truth from your partner. You cannot maintain the unity of the spirit with deceit.
8) Forgive one another
Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
Forgiveness is a virtue that must be constantly expressed in a home where the workings of the spirit of God will be effective. As couples, we are liable to offend each other. This is because of our differences which is as a result of our individual uniqueness. The devil can use unforgiveness as a legal ground of attack against your marriage. Therefore, resist the devil by walking in constant forgiveness and he will flee from you and your marriage.
9) Serve God together
Colossian3:23 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters”
Couples who serve God together are always happy couples and they are always United. Never be slack in the things of God. Try to maintain both personal and United worship atmosphere in your home
10) Always Appreciate your spouse
Appreciating one another will increase your love for each other. Make every single act of kindness shown to you by your partner count. A cup of tea served by your wife should be appreciated as though she has done a great deed. Also, wife’s should appreciate the hard work of their husbands, appreciate him for every house chores he does, and especially for loving you.
The bottom line
Do you want your marriage to last until a lifetime? Then, maintaining the unity of the spirit with your spouse is a sure guarantee for building and sustaining a happy, Godly marriage.
