Narcissist: 7 Best tips for living with a Narcissist
Narcissists are one of the hardest types of persons to live with because they demand so much from their partner yet they are insatiable. Instead of giving in to the demands of a narcissist, there are ways to handle them when you are able to identify the type of narcissism traits that he/she exhibits. These 5 best ways for living with a narcissist will help you greatly.
7 Best tips for living with a Narcissist
Don’t believe the narcissist’s fantasies when dealing with them.
Narcissists often have magnetic personalities and endearing demeanors. They’re pros at portraying an enticingly idealized version of themselves. We’re drawn to their outward displays of self-assurance and grandiose aspirations, and the more insecure we feel about ourselves, the stronger this attraction becomes. It’s simple to fall into their trap and believe they hold the key to making us feel like we matter and have a purpose in life. However, this is merely a dream and a very expensive one at that.
It won’t meet your requirements (or even be recognized). Keep in mind that narcissists aren’t searching for committed relationships, but rather compliant fans. Narcissists only care about you as long as you’re willing to feed their endless need for praise. What you want and how you feel are irrelevant.
Take a look at the narcissist’s behavior toward other people. To the extent that the narcissist lies, manipulates, hurts, and disrespects others, that is exactly how he or she will treat you. Don’t kid yourself into thinking you’re special and will be exempt.
Identify who they really are
Don’t look at things through rose-colored glasses. Realize the narcissist in your life and identify who they really are, and not who you want them to be. Don’t rationalize away the pain that bad behavior is causing you. Denying the problem will not make it go away. Reality check: narcissists are notoriously resistant to change, so you need to make a decision on whether you can sustain this lifestyle indefinitely.
Establish some limits.
Respect and care for one another are the cornerstones of a healthy relationship. However, narcissists aren’t able to sustain genuine two-way relationships. They can’t do it, and it’s not just a matter of willpower. It’s as if you don’t exist in their world. No one can hear you. They fail to see you as an individual with needs distinct from their own. This is why narcissists constantly cross others’ personal space lines. They act this way with an indescribable sense of entitlement for rummaging through your things, borrowing items, reading your mail and private correspondence, listening in on private conversations, crashing your party without your permission, stealing your ideas, or giving you unsolicited advice.
In order to start establishing healthier boundaries where your needs are respected, it is crucial to identify these violations of what they are.
7 Best tips for living with a Narcissist
Formulate a strategy.
It’s not simple to regain control after a prolonged pattern of allowing others to cross your boundaries. Prepare yourself for achievement by thinking through both your end goals and any potential roadblocks. What are the most significant alterations you anticipate making? Which of you has the upper hand, and how will that affect your strategy? To what extent do you plan to enforce your new limits?
If your answer is yes, then, you’ll be better able to assess your choices and create a workable strategy. You should also expect some other relationship shifts. A narcissist will become upset and threatened if you try to assert your independence. These people are accustomed to being in charge. To make up for it, they might increase their demands in other areas, withdraw as a form of punishment, or try to charm or manipulate you into abandoning the new boundaries. Keep your ground.
Let things roll off your back.
Don’t believe the narcissist’s false claims about you. Narcissists are not grounded in reality, and their perceptions of others reflect that. Don’t let their game of blame and shame bring you down. Refuse to take on blame, criticism, or responsibility that isn’t yours to carry. The narcissist is free to hold onto their own negativity. It’s not worth it to debate a narcissist.
To defend oneself and show the narcissist how wrong they are is human nature when under attack. However, they are unlikely to listen to you no matter how reasonable or convincing your argument is. And if you argue, it could get ugly. Avoid wasting your breath. Just let the narcissist know that you don’t agree with their evaluation and move on.
Give up your need to be accepted.
You must learn to stop caring about what the narcissist thinks and stop trying to appease them at the expense of your own needs and wants. You must be able to accept the truth about who you are, even if the narcissist has a different take on things.
Try to find help and meaning somewhere else.
Be realistic about your expectations if you decide to stay in a relationship with a narcissist. You won’t find genuine love and acceptance from him/her, so you should look elsewhere for these things. You’ll feel valued, heard, and at ease to be yourself in a relationship based on mutual respect and understanding. Be around those who will give you a true picture of who you are. Spending time with people who accept you for who you really are and validate your thoughts and feelings can help you maintain perspective and resist narcissistic manipulations.
Find fulfillment in your vocation, your volunteer efforts, and the activities you enjoy, try devoting yourself to endeavors that put your skills to good use while also allowing you to make a positive impact on the world.