The Llivingemerald

Tag: family

  • Tell your child you’re pregnant: 6 simple ways to happily announce your second pregnancy

    Tell your child you’re pregnant: 6 simple ways to happily announce your second pregnancy

    Planning to increase your family size by welcoming another child? Waoh! That’s awesome! However, You need to tell your child you’re pregnant. Telling your kid he will be having a baby sister or brother can look weird. A lot of Questions will pop up in your mind, like, how do I make Brandy understand he’ll be having a brother or sister? Will he actually understand why? Will he still know that Daddy and Mummy love him? Wouldn’t he think another baby is coming to take his place? How will he bond with the new baby? And lots more.

    There is no need to be worried, all you need to do is creatively tell your child you’re pregnant in 6 simple ways.

    1. Creatively tell your child you’re pregnant

    When I and my spouse started planning on having our second child, we literally involved our three-year-old in the discussion by telling, him that daddy and mummy will love to give him a sister or brother like some of his friends in school had.

    He was so excited to hear this as he has always talked about his friends who had sisters and brothers. He loves to cuddle his teddy bear and calls him baby. As a mother, I tried to explain to him that mummy can give him a real baby that he can play with, share his toys with, and go to school with, and that they will have lots of fun together. He was so happy and excited so much that he was already expecting his baby even when I was yet to get pregnant. This is the first step to telling your child you’re pregnant.

    2. Show your child some baby stuff around the house

    It wouldn’t be a big deal to tell your child you’re pregnant if you can get the child prepared psychologically and emotionally. Another way I tried to tell my child I am pregnant was to show him some of his baby stuff that are still in his baby wardrobe. It told him the baby stuff used to e for him but now that he has outgrown them then they will be used for his baby. On hearing this, he was excited so much that any time I tried to pick any of the baby stuff like clothes, he will say, ‘Mom, that’s for my baby, can you please keep it?’ Hearing him say such words made me know that he is actually prepared to have a brother or sister.

    3. Let your child know where the baby will come from

    During this time, my three-year-old will sometimes ask me, ‘Mom, where is my baby?’ and I will respond by telling him the baby is with God in heaven but will soon be in mummy’s stomach. That sounds weird, isn’t it? This made it easy for him to understand that mummy is carrying a child when I eventually got pregnant.

    When I got pregnant, I told him his baby is now in my stomach and he needs to be gentle with mummy, so the rough play will be limited, no running into a mummy for hugs but gentle hugs. Pretty well, he was able to understand and will usually ask, ‘Mom, is your stomach paining you? Is there a baby in your stomach?’ and I will answer with a yes.

    4. Let your child bond with the baby-to-be

    You don’t need lengthy words to tell your child you are pregnant, when your baby bump start showing, let the child touch the baby bump, speak with the baby and get connected with the baby emotionally. When you start showing could be a time you may want to tell your friends and family that you are pregnant, this is a good time to eventually tell your child that you are pregnant. I will suggest that you share the news first with your child before you share it with your friends and family.

    5. Let your child be at one of your hospital visits.

    My son was excited the first time he saw his baby on the screen when I went for my 12 weeks scan. He was happy to see the baby and had an increased expectation to have a new baby. He understood that of a truth, there is a baby in mummy’s stomach. My son sometimes advises that I go to the hospital and let the doctor touch my stomach whenever I complain of any discomfort in my lower abdomen.

    6. Get your child involved in picking out the baby things like clothes, etc.

    Getting my son involved in picking out the baby’s things and arranging the baby’s wardrobe is one of the exciting ways I told my child I was pregnant. Knowing that he was going to have a baby sister, he was excited to pick beautiful girls’ clothes, shoes, toys, and accessories for his baby-to-be.

    In conclusion, telling your child you’re pregnant can be an exciting and creative experience. By following these six simple steps, you can ensure a smooth transition for your child into becoming a big brother or sister. First, involve your child in the discussion and express your desire to give them a sibling. Next, show them some baby items around the house, signaling the arrival of a new family member.

    Explain to your child where the baby will come from in a way they can understand. As your pregnancy progresses, allow your child to bond with the baby by touching your baby bump and speaking to the baby. Consider bringing them along to one of your hospital visits, where they can see the baby on the screen and further connect with the idea of a new sibling.

    Finally, involve your child in picking out baby items, making them feel important and excited about the upcoming arrival. By taking these steps, you can ensure that your child feels loved, included, and prepared for the wonderful journey of welcoming a new brother or sister into their life.

     

  • My postpartum depression story

    My postpartum depression story

    My postpartum depression story.

    Postpartum depression is common among women after child delivery and can be a result of emotional changes, and psychological, physical, financial, and social changes.

    Postpartum depression is common among new moms who are first-time moms and each of these moms has unique symptoms of postpartum feelings or postpartum depression.

    Just like 75% of new moms who experience postpartum or baby blues, I have also had my fair share of it.

    If you are a new mom who is experiencing postpartum depression, know that you are not alone. As a first-time mom, I was so enthusiastic about having my baby and I have always fantasized about how my little prince charming will look like as I hold him. However, fate had a different plan for me.

    The pregnancy journey was all fine until my due date came and passed, I was 40 weeks and 2 days gone, and the anxiety of carrying the pregnancy begin to set in. All I wanted at this time was to have my baby delivered as I was getting emotionally and physically drained from carrying the pregnancy for so long. The doctor said I can still wait for one more week for the water to break and if not, there might be a need for a cesarean section.

    When I was 40 days and 5 days gone, I had this sharp pain in my tummy that stroked through my shoulder and my back and some little water coming from my vagina. And the vuum! I went to the hospital the following morning. The doctor said my cervix was 2cm dilated. The contractions were inconsistent and not strong for over 8 hours then the doctor said he will have to induce my cervix for quick contractions. After the inductions, the cervix was still 4cm dilated for another 8 hours and then the doctor said he will have to perform a compulsory c-section if the cervix dilation did not increase.

    With low energy and motivation, I agreed to the c-section. I was given loads of injections before and after the c-section, and 24 hours after the c-section I got better. I was happy to see my son and to hold him just like I have been optimistic.

    However, I experience fear, anxiety, irritation, sadness, and worry when my blood pressure will not be lowered and the breast milk will not flow out for the baby to suck and the baby cried a lot, refusing to be pacified with formula food.

    When we brought the baby home, a lot of family and friends came over, but I was so irritated by their presence and lots of talk. I knew I was getting depressed but I do not know how to handle this. I get upset and irritated at any slight provocation. I couldn’t eat much, I get angry so easily and wondered where the baby came from. Seeing the house cluttered, dirty, and disorganized was a major trigger for irritation and anxiety, and coupled with the fact that I was forced to eat certain cultural food which was believed to help in the increased production of breast milk was also irritating and depressing.

    I knew this was not the real me, so I decided to ask google what my symptoms indicate. I could have gone to the hospital but actually, I didn’t have the knowledge that postpartum depression was a medical condition that can be treated medically.

    So, when I discovered my symptoms were that of postpartum depression, I search for how to overcome postpartum depression.

    How I overcame postpartum depression

    The first step to overcoming postpartum depression is that recognized that I was depressed, and needed help. I spoke with my partner who encouraged me and I also spoke with a few friends who are moms and have experienced postpartum depression. They also encouraged me and gave me some tips on how to go easy with myself and the surrounding people to ease the symptoms of postpartum depression.

    Some tips that helped me overcome postpartum depression are:

    I accepted my child and the circumstances of his birth knowing that they were not my fault no anybody’s fault.

    I loved my child for who he is

    I accepted the fact the family members who take care of the baby will soon leave and I will have my privacy

    Domestic help can always clean the house

    My child is a gift from God which I must be grateful for.

    It’s not a must for me to breastfeed, I can bottle-feed and my baby will still be healthy.

    I constantly accepted love and asked for help from my partner

    I visited the hospital for postnatal depression therapy for my mental health improvement.

    I could overcome postpartum depression, not until 3 to 4 months after my delivery. I regained my normal life and my baby continued to grow healthy and loving.